Boundaries for Relationships

Twelve boundaries define our roles and protect the members, spirit, and culture of the Suppers groups. Observing these boundaries helps members keep the focus on their own path to wellness, allowing each of us to determine our own way using the authentic settings of the Suppers tables and the real settings of life.

  1. The only requirement for membership is the desire to lead a healthier life.
  2. Members actively practice nonjudgment for the sake of self, others, and group health. We foster a spirit of curiosity and experimentation to assure healing for the greatest number.
  3. Suppers embraces the time-honored tradition of anonymity, using first names only. Attendance at Suppers constitutes commitment to refrain from the mention of what is said and who is seen at meetings.
  4. Our only food bias is that in favor of whole food. Omnivores, vegans, and vegetarians are all served by Suppers, though individual meetings may be set up based on dietary preferences.
  5. The only fee is the cost to cover groceries and any fee associated with the location. Suppers meetings refrain from profit-making relationships. Members neither pay for services nor promote commercial interests. Each Suppers group is self-supporting. Outside speakers and literature are welcome. In the spirit of curiosity and experimentation, the Suppers forum invites educational but not promotional messages.
  6. The role of the facilitator is to gently guide meetings according to the agreed-upon format, concepts, and boundaries of the group. Facilitators help members honor each other’s competence to determine their own paths, model nonjudgment, and protect the emotional safety of the environment. Facilitators do not give advice on matters of health; rather, they help members create experiments and observe their own experiences.
  7. The role of members is to honor each other’s competence and determine for themselves the path they’ll each take to a healthier life. The steps will include listening, experimenting, self-observing, sharing if they care to, and deciding their course for themselves. Members honor each other’s personal and emotional space and respect the privilege of being invited into someone else’s home by observing house rules.
  8. The role of therapeutic friends is to provide support to each other on an as-needed basis as cooking mentors, walking partners, willing ears, and supporters of those who are journaling or doing Suppers experiments.
  9. At Suppers we do not recognize experts. We value expertise and especially the sharing of experiences but refrain from elevating even well researched personal biases. This boundary helps us keep the focus on biological individuality and the competence of each member to choose his or her own path to a healthier life.
  10. Each group is autonomous, co-created by its members, and has its own personality. Details such as type of meeting, time, format options, food budget, RSVPs, and food preferences are up to its members. At general Suppers meetings, there is broad tolerance of dietary preferences. The only bias is that in favor of whole food.
  11. Suppers meetings are no substitute for therapy or treatment. Suppers is about support for diet and lifestyle changes. Members take responsibility for getting professional help as needed.
  12. We orient ourselves to service in the wider world by modeling behaviors of nonjudgment and healthy living, as we understand it.