Through the miracle of Suppers the Reuben sandwich I ate in a moment of weakness was transformed into a bonified act of Nutritional Harm Reduction, a cause for celebration, not for feeling ashamed. The discussion at the table started with “Your brain is smarter than you are,” a document that makes a case for self-forgiveness and self-acceptance by describing how our urgent impulses to eat are greater than our willpower and for very good reasons.
I used to be one of those crunchy granola dads, always trying to get my kids to eat healthy, sneaking in plates of fruits and veggies at their pizza parties and serving oats for breakfast. No more. For me, kraut is the new granola.
Consuming sweet treats created a sense of happiness and wholeness starting from a very young age. Baking was the vehicle through which I created a uniquely strong bond with my grandmother and the other women in my family. Indulging in some home baked goodness always meant a rush of good feelings for me. The enticing aromas, rich textures, and of course sugary tastes sent a sensory stimulation overload to my tiny, developing body and brain.
We were having a conversation at Suppers about the reasons we eat that have nothing to do with resolving normal hunger. This is an emotionally charged question for me; it took me right back into the feelings and memories of baking with my grandmother.
I do much better things with this holiday than celebrate it.
At least, after years of making myself miserable at the holidays, I’ve found a way to take care of myself. While my friends engage in what seems to me to be institutionalized abusive eating on a holy day, I choose to eat more simply at Christmas than I do all year. There’s no clearer, kinder amount than zero when it comes to my holiday trigger foods.
It was an interesting departure from the usual business one night at Suppers, when we were reading about how people develop the taste for particular foods. The conclusion was that food scientists had it all figured out and that it related to designing combinations of ingredients that change how people feel. Each one of us could name a favorite fruit and a few vegetables we enjoy, but the foods that we used to feel less lonely or give us a boost of energy were all manufactured foods. We all had health problems related to a weakness for sweet, creamy, and starchy comfort foods.
A discussion of the 11th boundary helped us all make distinctions about what we could reasonably expect from a support group and what we needed to do with medical practitioners. Sometimes it’s difficult for me to distinguish which issues I should be addressing with my doctor and which ones I should address on my own. I have thyroid problems and had just crossed over into type 2 diabetes at the time I started Suppers. I am conscientious about my appointments and have good relationships with the doctors who care for me.
I am so lucky I didn’t have to quit everything before I got to Suppers. I am an expert quitter and an accomplished relapser. So it helped me to learn that there’s a program that embraces you while you’re in the process of quitting and relapsing and supports you as you spiral up towards better health. One day we went around the table and shared what had grabbed us about The Suppers Programs. For me it was the line, “With food, abstinence is not an option. That leaves harm reduction.”
I had been very sick for three years. My symptoms were bloating, stomach pain, heartburn, nausea, and diarrhea. I could barely eat food, lost 15 pounds, and was weak and sick all the time.
I went from doctor to doctor, had a few trips to the emergency room and had tons of tests. I had a colonoscopy and an endoscopy, and the doctors still couldn’t figure out what was wrong.
I'm a very visual person, graphic artist, videographer. You know the type. So when I finally started to make some progress through the support of Suppers, I looked back at myself and saw a building that had no ground floor. I never knew I had no ground floor.
I had been toying with Suppers on and off for a few years. My energy wasn't what I wanted it to be and I needed to lose weight. I did a bit of this and a bit of that, floating around the programs.
